This week I did a free session with a lovely lady who really wants to create a business model that serves both her and her ideal clients. She has a beautiful vision and an obvious passion to make a difference in the world.
There were a few blocks that she could see to her bringing this vision into the form. One of them, and a very common one, was the uncertainty of what might or might not happen. Would she get the clients? Be able to fulfill her end of the bargain? Make the money? In other words, be successful?
As we explored her vision at first, it was difficult for her to stay out of the “known”, all those familiar reasons why something doesn’t seem possible. You may recognize some of them:
- not enough time to do it
- not enough money to do it
- not got the skills to make it happen,
- not got the patience
- Lack of confidence
- Is it a good enough idea?
As she talked about the reasons why something she wanted wasn’t possible, it brought up for me the image of a brick and then as she judged each belief as good or bad it felt like she was cementing them together and creating her own self imposed walls. These bricks (her beliefs/ideas) were literally being cemented into place by her own judgments. In other words, it was he own engagement with them that was making them appear real.
It’s so innocent.
We identify and give power to arbitrary thoughts and then have the experience of being stuck or overwhelmed or confused and so on. Somehow we miss the fact that we are innocently buying into this illusory self created “prison”. The prison could translate into our feeling stuck or confused or overwhelmed or whatever tight feeling we experience.
We mistakenly think the tight feeling is because of an outside experience such as our bank balance being low, or the lack of clicks on our website, or a diminishing client list. None of it is true.
Our feelings never come from the circumstances or other people. They are always coming from our own thinking. In fact, thought and feeling are 2 sides of the same coin. They can never be separated. So when we are feeling anything we are actually just being reminded that thinking is happening. Nothing else.
Isn’t that a relief?
That means we don’t have to change anything whatsoever. It means we don’t have the job of controlling the outside to make us feel better. Whew!
We have never been in charge and never will be. If that doesn’t sound true to you, think about the fact that you can’t stop breathing if you want to! Something is breathing you, you are not in charge.
Our only “job” is to enjoy the ride – whether that takes us up or down – taking our hands off the steering wheel won’t make any difference because we aren’t steering the car anyway
Give it a go! Let go of the wheel and once you stop worrying about what’s going to happen because you are not in control, notice if once your thinking calms down if you have that feeling of peace and calm that you truly want to feel.
I’d love to hear how you get on. Please drop me a line or post on the blog.